Wednesday, December 12, 2007

First Step of Troubleshooting

Why do people call up tech support and make a blanket statement to describe their problem? What's worse is they actually expect an answer. Let's break down the following conversation:

GTG> Grumpy Tech Support. How may I help you today?
User> Yeah. Hi. The Internet is down.
The first step of troubleshooting is to accurately define the problem. The Internet was designed to remain functioning after a nuclear attack. There is no way "The Internet is down." So what he meant to say was "I cannot get to the Internet."

Let's return to the conversation:
GTG> I should be able to help you with that.
User> What would cause the Internet to go down like that?
Hold on there partner. His delusion continues. Time to set him straight.
GTG> There are many things that could cause you to not access the Internet...
User> Oh, I can get to the Internet fine. I get a "Page can not be displayed" error when I go to certain websites.
Yes. That sounds like the Internet is down to me too. So the correct definition of the problem is that certain websites do not work.
GTG> It's possible the company that hosts the websites are having issues...
User> That's not what the guy on the phone said.
Guy? Phone? What am I? Chopped liver?
GTG> You talked to someone else about this?
User> Yeah. I called the phone number they have listed on the website.
Ok. We're going in circles here. How could he have gotten a phone number off a website that shows "page can not be displayed"?
GTG> What did the guy say?
User> He said that he can get to that page fine. He said that there must be something wrong on my end and to call my tech support guy. So I called you.
Ahh! So now we get to the bottom of this. "Doofus" didn't want to talk to my man, the user here, so he funnels him over to me.
GTG> Well I will do what I can to help. Try to go to the web page again while I connect to your computer. I want to see what you are seeing.
User> Ok, but it's not going to... HEY! It worked! Wow. You guys are good.
Go figure. But I'll gladly take credit...

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